Saturday, November 12, 2016

Waiting for Sasquatch

I walk along the fringe separating the sixth fairway from the thick scrub of woods on the eastern edge of Surfside Golf course, occasionally shining my anemic flashlight into the paths left by golfers looking for lost balls. It is well past dusk, the wife and dogs walk ahead of me down the middle of the fairway. The moon is a crescent in the dimly lit sky, next to a faint Venus.
Of all the places on the planet where a Sasquatch might be, this location should be one of the most likely in the world. (click for more)

According to the BFRO database, (THE most complete and diligent forum for investigated reports of Hairy Humanoids) Washington State has 622 investigated reports, with Pierce County having the highest number in the state (75) with King County being 2nd at 46. Grays Harbor County, just up the coast has 42 reports.

At this writing, I am in Pacific County at my beach cabin, but my main home is right next to the border between King and Pierce, the two counties with the highest incidence of Bigfoot accounts in the entire world.

Why do I think my current location is ripe for an encounter? Two reasons: 1). Just about a mile from where my flashlight punches into the dank woods lives a man who claims to have a family of Sasquatches who he shares sandwiches with, and 2). this place FEELS Bigfooty.

That wholly unscientific assessement is a weak argument, yes, but the entire supposition that we share the planet with a giant, hairy humanoid that is so ghost-like that it can almost never be seen much less photographed is a visit to Crazytown in itself.

My wife yells at Dog number two because I have let it off the leash and the dog furrows into the wet bushes. My focus on sleuthing is interrupted by her worry, and I cannot argue with her because we HAVE seen bears here just last summer. At that moment, when I turn to see where she is in the dark
I see a light across the fairway, on hole number 5.

Its another human, with a flashlight and I am surprised. On our frequent night time golf course sorties, I have never seen another person here and so I stop behind a big tree and watch them walk beyond the tee box and out of view back toward the clubhouse. An employee out checking sprinkler heads or...?

Dog number 2 is back out running toward the sand traps in the sixth green and so I follow, wondering if there might be a nice, fat footprint in the perfect, freshly dampened substrate.
No such luck, Chuck. I found the telltale cloven-hooved tracks of a deer, though, arguably an important Bigfoot food source, and I saw the fresh prints dog 2 had made.

It's not THAT big, is it?

I tried to mash my own boot into the edge of the trap, finding it rather firm underfoot. Bigfoot prints have been found in sand before, most notably in the dunes near Tillamook, Oregon, but these traps are raked regularly so my small hopes are further diminished.

I am angling toward a dark corner of the seventh tee box here, a place I have passed numerous times during golf rounds and wondered about for its perfect concealment. From a place just inside the scrub one can see the all the way to the clubhouse and down the expanse of both the ninth and sixth fairways, basically the entire golf course perimeter on two sides.

My fantasy is to come here at night with a Sasquatch researcher/friend, with just a sack of snacks, a couple of comfy lawn loungers and sleeping bags, and a night vision/flir equipped video camera. We will make no fire, we will be very quiet for the most part, but will àlso allow ourselves to be noticed from time to time by any wildlife by chatting normally.

MopFoot, leaving the scene of a mess

In this way, according to my acqauintances in the Bigfoot Research world, our chances of an encounter are dramatically increased.

I could jam some apples into the the stubs of broken tree branches, or, as in the case of my nearby contact, leave peanut butter sandwiches on a tray, but that requires more time and patience.

Wait, WHAT? 

In the ongoing field of hairy hominid research, patience IS the key. The hot trend revolves around 'habituation', which is just how any serious study of primates in wild places is done.

Go to where they are seen/Bring something they like to eat/Leave, but return later and watch quietly/Repeat often. Also, do it at night.

Out on the beach, proper, I walk each day and contemplate our concepts of time. Its easy to do in a place that is so devoid of the markers of time. Sky meets Ocean, meets Sand. On overcast days, all are shades of gray. The wind blows swift, low curtains of sand grains against my legs and Sandpipers flit through exceedingly rapid tumults in swarms like a single organism. This feels timeless.

Humans think in terms of hours. How long has it been since I ate something? How long until the sun goes down? How many days until the weather gets cold. These signs, hunger, aversion to cold or darkness are built in to our genes through evolution. They are preciously short indicators as opposed to the forces that sculpt the earth. This is probably why Global Warming is such a hard sell to the general public. We, as untrained, short-lived citizens, have difficulty with the concepts of geologic time.

And some suggest, as a growing number of Sasquatch researchers believe, our quarry is particularly long-lived, numbering the days into the mid-one hundred rountinely.  Wild speculation, of course, but some species of turtles live well past 100 years and Bowhead Whales (also Greenland Sharks) have an AVERAGE lifespan of 200.

Is it conceit that makes us think we can lure a giant forest man-ape into meaningful contact with a P,B&J or just a special brand of crazy?

Look, I TOLD you..NO WHEAT BREAD, dude.

My contact here at the beach believes that Sasquatches do not like wheat bread. He believes that the sandwiches he makes, Peanut butter and jelly on WHITE bread are the best food to offer Bigfoot, through trial and error. The wheat bread sandwiches were ignored while the white bread treats were scarfed up, on one occasion, in broad daylight, just paces away, him on his covered deck, an 8 foot tall Bigfoot behind the corner of an old truck canopy, they both enjoyed their lunch.

Last July, I spotted him standing outside his snazzy 4WD coupe across the street from Jacks Country Store and pulled in to chat with him. I am keeping his identity on the down low because I think its best, though he is a fairly open book about his experiences. In fact, most of what I know about him I learned from the internet and the BFRO. I will call him R.

R contacted the BFRO with the wild story of his ongoing relationship, and investigators converged here to see for themselves. Their verdict: R is telling the truth.

On the street corner, R is talking with an older man, smoking a cigarette and being animated. He is tall, a big man even, with longish hair and beard. He favors sleeveless sweatshirts that show off his upper arm tattoo.

I try not to act too pushy, but I want to know everything I can learn about his visitors.
'Ehh...they dont come around as much during the summer when everbody comes to the beach.'
I am supressing my bullshit meter now, and he continues, 'but I found a big footprint on the side of an embankment by the house the other day.'

This is a far cry from his online claim of hearing and seeing a Sasquatch try to speak an apparent name.

R rambled for an additonal twenty minutes about recent positive changes in his life and and I knew any useful information was not going to surface, so I handed him my business card (carpentry) and asked him to email if he could about having me stop by to see his situation.

Maybe he feels his 15 minutes of public adoration are done now that the BFRO people have backed him up, so having a fan club is less of a draw now.

I am on my own, then, and this is what one of those investigators, Scott Taylor, told me.
'Just go out in your own backyard at night and wait quietly.....they will come to you.'
'I, ah, tried to reason..with you people...but, ah..Obamafoot OUT!'

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Paranormal Bigfoot and the Tide of Perception

   'You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.' Dylan

Maybe it's lazy thinking, maybe it's the natural progression of opinions over time, prodded by the frustration of lack of evidence, but more and more people in the world of Bigfoot research are veering to what Thom Powell calls the 'woo woo', the weirdness, the inexplicable aspects of Sasquatch reports that do not fit neatly into the hard science box.  Click here for more.

                                                               Erik Beckjords idea of Patty

Doc Meldrum must be really tired of fighting off wackjobs (like me) who pepper him with bizarre, wholly unscientific questions like 'So, ah, Doc..if Bigfoots can, like, disappear whenever they want, why don't they just come to the supermarket to get their donuts and stuff?'

'I like the ones with sprinkles.'

When I asked him this (not really, I asked far more sciency questions) he was very patient and didn't seem all that rehearsed, but always answered the way a professor who likes his job would answer: by not saying much.

Why not? Because we STILL don't know very much. Let's make some lists.

What We Know For Sure -
Sasquatch witness reports number in the thousands. While visual sightings don't constitute solid evidence, there's a powerful pattern here that requires more digging.

The Patterson/Gimlin Film. The holy grail of BF evidence, it's been so deeply researched that the possibility that it represents actual photographic proof also begs more research from science types.

We have DNA. Ketchum and Sykes have tried to get the word out that 'novel DNA' from 'non-human' sources have been found repeatedly among the many samples submitted and tested. This said, the internet argument rages on because, on the internet ANYBODY can pose as being intelligent and correct about something and cause crapstorms of controversy. The task of ferreting out what is true and real becomes very onerous, so we're often left hanging unless scientific methods are published and consensus is reached by at least a few educated and trained specialists.

  Sykes and Ketchum...I think.

What We THINK We Know-
Sasquatches can disappear at will. Lots of stories, but of course, no photographs. (Unless you count Todd Standings strange photos, or Melissa Hovey's 'Sasquatch back' game cam picture, considered by supporters to be among the best out there.) Yes, photographing an invisible creature might be a contradiction by description, but the rumors of Bigfoot vanishing mid-step are fairly numerous.

Bigfoot can read minds, communicate telepathically. Why not? This is such a highly personal claim that unless it happens to you, it will always be up for dispute. Those that claim to hear them in their head are also growing in number. Is this a form of social media hypnosis?

Sasquatches can 'zap' humans, other animals. Reports, again, anecotal, suggest that people who see a Bigfoot are momentarily paralyzed, and/or feel incapacitated by sudden sickness, which lifts after the encounter is over. Again, a highly personal perception, but I myself have had an very unusual experience during an overnight stay at Derek Randle's Olympic Project site. After Derek announced a night hike to check some bait stations, I headed for my van to get my audio gear. The moment I stepped out the door of the main meeting place, I was hit by a strong wave of nausea. It so palpable that I nearly fell against the side of the building, but managed to weave my way to the van, parked in the pasture between the meeting hall and the treeline. I felt like my body had dropped in temperature to the point where I was instantly shivering. The outside temp was cool, but not freezing. I got to the van and crawled in back and it was all I could do to get inside my sleeping bag. My head pounded, I shivered and I think I slept for a few minutes. When I came to, I was sweating and felt the dizziness and pain was gone. I got up, grabbed my gear to join the group but back at the shop they were gone. I have never had a sudden onset illness like that before or since.

Bigfoot travels interdimensionally. This claim falls as a subset of the invisibility aspect, but there are visual reports of Sasquatches coming into and going out of view through a sort of window that opens and closes in plain view. Skeptics chalk this up to tv shows like Star Trek or Stargate, but believers suggest a connection between the phenomenon and the writers of those shows. Even though I'm a crazy 'bizarre' bigfoot aficionado, this idea makes me chuckle.

So...Scientists vs. Non-scientists/laymen, the debate will continue vs. Educated Professional and Ordinary people, but let's make a formal list of the Notables here too:

Notable People Who Believe Bigfoot Is A Flesh And Blood, Physical Creature That Is Just Really Good At Avoiding Humans Camp.

Dr. Meldrum - He's never going to cave and say he heard one in his head or saw it disappear in front of his eyes. He'd almost certainly lose his tenure and his job at Idaho State. We need him, too. Somebody has to hold the line and not buy into things that cannot be proven. Stay the course, Doc.

Dr. Bindernagel – Dr. B is unlikely to change his mind either. I watched in person at the Ocean Shores Sasquatch Summit when Bindernagel, a guest at the request of Todd Standing, brought in to back up Standings' claim of BF activity in Ontario, actually BACKED AWAY from agreeing with Standing at the moment he took the stage. It was surprising, as Meldrum was much more enthusiastic about Standing. Todd's face visibly dropped when Dr. B said, paraphrased, 'Well, no, actually, I never saw an actual footprints on that hillside.'

Notable People Who Originally Thought Sasquatches Were Forest Apes, But Now Think They Are Paranormal.

The way the wind is blowing tells me that the following people are among a growing group who have come around in their thought process to accept that Bigfoot is not just a human-throwback, but a special lifeform that can do things humans cannot.

Johnson, Davies and Carlson

Dr. Matthew Johnson. Johnson saw a big hairy creature while hiking with his family at the Oregon Caves Monument. He claimed that it followed him as he hurried his family to safety. Today Johnson has stated publicly that he thinks Sasquatch creatures can travel through portals, read minds and communicate mentally with humans.

Scott Taylor. Taylor is a BFRO investigator who had worked hard at vetting reports that come in to the BFRO hq. He knows the importance of detailed questioning, checking for sign(s) and following up on further developments. Recently he has visited Johnson's Southern Oregon Interaction Area and on Dr. J's Youtube site he concurs that 'there's Squatch in this area.' Also he is on board with them possessing unusual capabilities.

Adam Davies. Brit cryptozoologist and author approached the subject of Bigfoot as a physical creature but after a visit with another researcher, John Carlson to Matthew Johnson's original Southern Oregon Habituation Area had an encounter with small, hairy creatures that seemed to appear out of a portal.
He speaks about the experience rarely, but agrees that there is far more to the phenomenon that meets the eye.

John Carlson. Davie's tent mate on that visit also experienced high strangeness and both basically agree on what they witnessed. The only difference, as Carlson has said in radio interviews is that he felt the 'entities were evil', and possibly 'demonic' whereas Davies seems to stop short of that classification, at least in public.

'Be vewwy vewwy qwiet!'

People Who Have Thought All Along That Bigfoot Was A Ghost/Spirit/ET.

Kewaunee Lapseritis. Author and Master Herbalist, Lapseritis is deep into the esoterics of other-worldly Bigfoot, beginning as a Naturalist, he dove head first into the paranormal fray when he was contacted by both an ET and a Sasquatch at the SAME TIME. That would twist anybody's melon, but Mr. L seems pretty constant and clear in his lectures, citing the messages he continues to receive that repeat warnings to humans that we're messing things up and it's probably too late to all come together and fix it.

Indian Peoples All Over The Nation. Look at any First Nations myth about Monsters and you will find the Sasquatch mentioned as a 'people' or 'tribe' not much different than them, aside from having the ability to do all the aforementioned stuff like go invisible and read minds. It's always hard for white people, non-natives to accept the wildness of these claims, but more and more they are beginning to make sense. Non believers = Zero. Indian Peoples – One.

This list is going to grow as time goes on, of course. And I maintain that the 'woo woos' will gain ground over the scientists, perhaps at our peril, but at least we MIGHT learn something about Sasquatch and in turn, something about ourselves. 

Thursday, August 11, 2016

How Old Bigfoot?

The old joke goes: How Old Bigfoot?  Answer: Old Bigfoot just fine! But is he really fine?

How long do Sasquatch creatures live?  What? You have no idea? You say, 'look dude, we don't even know if they truly exist much less what their lifestyle and life expectancy might be.' 

Ok, ok, for the sake of argument and useful speculation, let's say they exist and that they are physical, flesh and blood creatures. Now we can cite the numerous witness reports to dress out size, weight and basic physiology.

I stink, therefore I am!

This is a biped, it has two arms with human-like hands at the ends. A single head and the basic torso that all humans share. There are reports that Bigfoot creatures have nipples, which further humanizes them, suggesting a typical birth process that create little Bigfoots. How cute!

But if we can theorize that this bipedal hybrid animal is a mammal that must live on our plain of existence, then we might be able to conclude that they eat and drink and breathe the same air we do. Since the bulk of Sasquatch sightings are mostly from this country, I cite the statistic that average human life spans in the United States are said to be 76 years for men and 81 for the ladies. 

But humans are not Sasquatches. As clever, highly evolved Homo sapiens, we have erected (forgive the pun) a complex cage of mitigating circumstances that both lengthen and shorten our lives. Good medicines and Doctor/surgeons fix things that go south in our bodies, while we work hard at ruining our health with lethargy, drug addiction, food additives, pollution and stress. 
I feel pretty good for my age!

So your average Bigfoot should ostensibly be much better off in terms of his health, given that they don't consume the awful things humans do, they run like the wind, they breathe cleaner air and the only stress they might have is when they slip up and are forced to dodge an occasional semi-truck. 

Even though Sasquatches don't undergo the surgical procedures that humans use to prolong life, I maintain that since they do not ingest the bad things we ingest, they are unlikely to need to have diseased organs removed and/or replaced. It's a wash.

Humans like Okinawans lived very long, healthy lives due to their diets and social customs. Mostly vegetarian, along with regular exercise and in the close-knit families who include grandparents living with their children's children, many Okinawans lived well over 110 years. That number plummeted after the 1960s when more westernized diets became popular in Japanese prefectures and cancer rates began to rise. This suggests that clean living increases life span, which puts Mr. Natural in a good place for a long life.
I should buy a boat

But according to the work of Oregon Zoologist, Dr. W. Hennner Fahrenbach, in 1998:

'By applying scaling formulae to the 660 lb body of the average sasquatch, a gestation period of about 9 months and an average life span (in captivity) of 36 years can be estimated. This life expectancy implies an occasional survival into the fifth decade, reports which account for descriptions of some animals as looking old and wrinkled, having "rotten, snaggle teeth" and unkempt, matted "angora goat dreadlocks" or patchy, worn hair. Survival times for gorillas in captivity range into the middle of the third decade of life.' 

This is a sad conclusion. While it is understandable that a scientist might make this conclusion based on captive animals, our friend the Bigfoot is hardly a typical zoo animal. While his habitat may be continually encroached upon by loggers and developers, BFs are not dependent on the food sources of zoo animals nor subject to the stress of being caged and observed for decades.

This said, we do have good reportage of Sasquatches that are not exactly the picture of health. 
From the BFRO:
Willie Nelson called....wants his personality back.

'So I got to see a Sasquatch up close and personal. My window was down and I was no more than 20 feet from him. His face was human looking except that he had no chin and he had a somewhat heavy brow ridge. The nose was a human nose and was more european than african looking. The eyes were black, the skin was grey as was his hair and he had more or less human teeth...what was left of them. His teeth were in terrible condition.'

And from the BFRO investigator, Scott Taylor:
'He remarked that the teeth were all yellow, chipped, and some were missing. It is quite likely that this creature was old.'

But how old, Scotty? The witness did not venture a guess and how could he?
I know I have a birth certificate lying around the cave somewhere, dang it!

We can estimate the age of a horse by looking at it's teeth, however. And while we don't have any Sasquatch teeth handy, let's assume that 'yellow, chipped' teeth in 'terrible condition', even some ostensibly missing, would put Hairy the Squatch at least forty or so, ok?
We know that Apes, Gorillas, Chimpanzees and Orang-Utans have average life spans of around 40 years and that gorillas in captivity can live as much as 50 years. Cheetah, Tarzan's sidekick, lived to be 80 years old, which is a long time to play second fiddle to a TV star.

So we could conclude that a Great Ape hybrid might live as long as this.

Old Yellow Top, a purported Sasquatch creature that frequented Cobalt, Ontario Canada was first reported in 1906, and still apparently around as recently as 1970, which would put him at about 64 years of age, and it seems fair to assume he didn't just pop onto the scene as an adult.

So, until we actually bump into a Sasquatch birthday party and can count the candles, the jury will remain out. It seems safe to say that if Bigfoot was eligible for Social Security, there would be some checks going out to some pretty woodsy addresses as the best estimate for a senior Squatch comes in at over 64 Seasons. Happy Birthday Big Guy...look under the log, I left you a toothbrush.

Thursday, June 23, 2016

Invisible Bigfoot

This morning as I let my dog out to do his business in the yard, I noticed the same phenomenon I’ve seen many times before. If I stand very still with the door slightly ajar as I watch him, he does not seem to notice me and he soon walks out of my view.

The practice of an animal becoming stock-still in order to avoid detection is a common one throughout all of the natural world, including that of Sasquatch.

DATE: late Nov. 1990-92
STATE: Texas
COUNTY: Red River
NEAREST TOWN: Manchester, Texas
OBSERVED: I was deer hunting 10-12 years ago in late Nov. I was on a deer lease in Red River County. I was sitting on a stool and observed deer scrapes on trees along a creek bed. I was watching for these deer to approach. After I had been sitting there for an hour or so I turned my head and noticed what looked like an 8 or 9-foot tall stump that wasn't there earlier. It was approximately 120-130 yards away. I raised my deer rifle and looked through the scope at it. Through my 6X scope, I was able to see it as close up as if it were 30 feet away from me. It was looking right at me. It was a large ape-like creature. I kept it in my sight for 15-20 minutes. It never moved. I then heard a snap off to my left. I turned my head to observe where this noise came from. I didn't see anything. When I turned back to the creature, it was gone! It had been standing in grass that was knee-high to me, about a foot and a half to 2 feet tall. I feel that it couldn't have moved away in the short period of time my attention was drawn away. I feel that it dropped down in the grass to avoid detection. I feel that the snapping noise was made by another creature to divert my attention from the other one. At this time, I got up and left everything but my rifle and backed out of the area. I had this thing dead to rights in my scope but couldn't shoot because I did not feel threatened.”

Come ON people! How conceited are we to assume that Bigfoot conspires to trick us with misdirection and by hiding in plain sight?  Are we so self-important to believe that these creatures should need to play games like hide and seek?  Maybe we are, and maybe they do, but it seems like a waste of time for Bigfoot to toy with hunters this way.
You would think they would be more concerned with avoiding us altogether so they can spend time chasing down a deer or something. But the most important parts of this hunter's story is how insanely fast the huge creature disappeared, and how the creature did it so quietly. In the two seconds this guy turned his head, it was gone.

My point here is that if a creature the size of a Volkswagen Beetle stood on it's end can disappear from sight in the time it takes to turn your head, without making any discernible noise, it must be doing so in a non-physical way.   In other words, the Bigfoot isn't running way, he's dissolving from view. He might still be there, but we can't see them for reasons that have not been satifactorily explained to date.

All of this lack of success leaves me feeling a bit militant about Bigfoot being a real, live creature.

To be fair, ultimately it is up to each of us to make up our minds, do our own research if we want incontrovertible proof.
Look, the exit is THIS way, dude!

Bigfoot, WISHING he was invisible right about now.

But one source of information about BF invisibility can be found on Loren Coleman's Cryptomundo site;
'Invisibility of Bigfoot has been known about since at least the 60’s. People who know about, do not become Bigfoot researchers because they are pretty sure it is a waste of time trying to study something that is invisible most of the time. People who do not know about it, may become Bigfoot researchers because they do not know what they are up against. So the law of natural selection weeds out those who know about Bigfoot invisibility in the ranks of researchers. Sali Sheppard Wolford’s book “Valley of the Skookum”, clearly describes Bigfoot invisibility. Mary Green’s book describes the evidence but fails to reach any conclusion.'

 Here is a link to that page, and it's an amazing story:

Sunday, April 10, 2016

What is Bigfoot?

What AM I?
Like any good mystery, the saga of the search for Sasquatch has plenty of twists and turns. To date, it's been nearly 50 years since the P/G film surfaced and news media reports have seriously considered big hairy monster stories should be worth printing. It's probably time to revisit the original question: What is Bigfoot?

As recently as five years ago, it was complete heresy to suggest that Bigfoot was anything other than a full on flesh and blood, throwback to human ancestry. Bob Gimlin and his buddy Patterson sparked the speculation and our obsession with body mechanics, muscle groups and how they relate to known primates like gorillas and chimpanzees and the mammary-blessed, live Girl-rilla that is Patty has been the dominant theory ever since.

The five main theories currently flying through the blogosphere are (in order of mundane to plain bizarre:

1). Bigfoot isn’t real. Sightings of big hairy monsters are a combination of mistaken identities of bears, moose or elk or humans in gorilla costumes or are just plain hoaxes and pranks.

2).Bigfoot is a 'missing link', flesh and blood, non-human primate. They live in small groups in forested areas around the planet, with heavier concentrations in the Pacific Northwest.

3). Bigfoot are a people, an ape/human hybrid ‘tribe’ that has co-existed with humans since before recorded history. The lack of fossil evidence is due to their cultural practice of burying their dead in caves and/or from animal predation. They have high intelligence and are mostly adept at stealth and contact avoidance.

4). Bigfoot is human hybrid that was ‘engineered’ by advanced non-human, off-planet cultures and was designed to perform physical tasks and/or as a way to monitor human influence and effect on the planet.

5). Bigfoot is an alien entity from a different planet altogether, having arrived on earth only a few thousand years ago (to explain the lack of fossil record). They came because their planet was destroyed by war. (google 'Bigfoot, Maldek' for a fun surprise!).They have capabilities that defy our understanding of physics, including invisibility, mind reading/communication, as well as interdimensional access.

'I can't SEE!'

These five are the most popular theories, there are more, but they are too outlandish to include, like the idea that Bigfoot is a cyborg or even a robot suit that Aliens wear when they want to do some spying or adventure trekking around Earth.

For me, the problems with believing in the ‘leftover ape from prehistory’ theory is the missing fossils and the lack of other any other evidence like good photos, videos, hair and scat.
Sure, some say that stuff exists, but it’s surely in such short supply as to make positive conclusions scurrilous.

So that leaves the weirder explanations open to consideration. The sheer number of witness accounts is no longer compartmentalized as mistaken identity. Too many very good, even trained observers with reputations at stake tells me that there really IS a non-human critter hanging around some of the unpopulated places of the nation and the world.

So why is Bigfoot so much harder to photograph than a bear, a wolf or cougar? Is it possible that the oversized two-leggers are just so hyper-aware that they can sense and avoid human presence better than any other creature on the planet? This seems specious too. Wolves are extremely sensitive animals, with smell and hearing capabilities exemplified by huge ears and a long snout. By all accounts, Sasquatches are much more human like, with small ears and nose, a body type that is more suited to hunkering down than to rapid flight.

Look close. That's a bear carcass, baby.

So what is their secret? Just their habit of only coming out at night? That’s a non-starter since there are tons of known animals that prefer the dark of night to hunt, and since there are plenty of daytime sightings of Bigfoot. Also, there is the ability to disappear quickly without a trace is documented in witness reports, some suggesting a triple Usain Bolt action, some claiming the ‘flash of light’ method. 

What other creature might we compare to Sasquatch that fits this criteria?
It would have to be critter that can almost never be photographed, a beastie that leaves no trace of it’s passage or presence and an entity that has is far smarter and capable than humans. Agreed?

How about one of these:

This creature has been witnessed by many people, it defies being photographed just like Bigfoot and seems to come and go at it’s complete leisure. In order to evade us dumb humans, it supposedly defies physics and travels between worlds.

See where I’m going with this? Yep, Bigfoot is an alien. NO, wait. I didn’t say that.

Bigfoot does not run around in a spaceship and abduct people. But there are similarities.
If you ask Bigfoot sensitives like Jack Lapseritis  he will tell you that Bigfoot IS an off planet entity whose agenda is to warn humans not to screw up earth with War and pollution.

'Why won't anybody pick me up? Is it my breath?'

What do I believe? Well, if you lump up the previous bulletin points like ‘scarcity, a number of human-like traits along with extraordinary capabilities and apparent communication with select individuals, I have to go to Dr. Google for an answer;

Search - 'disappear instantly, communicate telepathically, warn humanity'

The first link is for ‘Yeti, Yowie’ and ‘ ETs’

Then this one:

So, are The Sasquatch and Aliens the same thing? Of course not. How could an 8 foot tall Forest Gorilla fit in one of those spacecraft along with all those little bug-eyed dudes? Humorously, there are reports of Bigfoot actually walking out of a spacecraft and even being seen inside of them chatting with Grays about the days events. I’m much too far in to La La land to discount that scenario now. But the supposition that Bigfoot works in collusion or at the behest of the smaller, bug-like creatures does make some sense. A few authors have suggested that Bigfoot is a created life-form, just as humans were bio-engineered, by an advanced culture and tasked with doing the heavy labor that the spindly little Grays could not manage in our Earthly atmosphere.

Still with me?

'You are one UGLY baby...but, you're mine, I guess.'

Even as far back as Zecharia Sitchin’s work on The Anunnaki, the connection between advanced life forms and Bigfoot was made evident. Sitchin suggested that The Anu’s came to Earth looking for Gold because, you know, it’s bitchin’ stuff, and in order to get at it, they created humans to dig it up. When humans proved to be underbuilt and way too hard to control, they went back to the lab and came up with a better version. The new human was a lot hairier, which precluded the need for pesky clothing, could lift tons of stuff easily and was happy with a few berries and maybe a deer carcass. 

'Whoa there, you look TASTY!'

Check the link:

Is this what I believe Bigfoot is?  Heck, why not? You have a better explanation, I’m listening.

Sunday, March 27, 2016

Bigfoot For President

And now for the edification of readers of Bizarre Bigfoot comes the news of the candidacy of Washington State Attorney Andrew D. Basiago. The reason for Mr. Basiago’s inclusion on this site is one of his campaign promises, the full disclosure and protection of the species of hominid we lovingly know as ‘Sasquatch’.

But the bizarreness does not end here.
                                                Click the images to make 'em bigger! Do it!
Turns out Mr. B also has some rather unusual history, including a childhood spent time-traveling to Mars, and the conclusion that one particular rock photographed on Mars looks like a Bigfoot

Here’s an excerpt from the press release:
“A lawyer in the United States has written the National Geographic Society, asking it to publish in National Geographic his discovery that a photograph taken and beamed back to Earth by NASA’s Mars Rover Spirit contains evidence of life on Mars. In his letter, Andrew D. Basiago, 47, wrote that his analysis of the NASA photograph of the Red Planet captioned PIA10214 has revealed images of human and animal life forms, as well as statues and other structures built by advanced, intelligent beings. “This image is the most significant photograph ever taken by human beings from Earth,” Basiago wrote. Sadly for Mr B, photo experts are saying that the “Bigfoot on Mars” rock is actually just a few inches high and a few yards from the camera.

Here is Basiago’s press release in whole:
A lawyer in the United States has written a letter to the president of the National Geographic Society providing him with evidence of humanoid and animal life on Mars that he has found in a photograph taken by NASA's Mars Rover Spirit.
This epochal discovery constitutes the first evidence ever gathered proving the existence of life beyond planet Earth, and affirms controversial theories long advanced in works of literature and science that Mars, one of Earth's nearest celestial neighbors, harbors life.
Andrew D. Basiago, the lawyer who discovered the evidence of life on Mars, begins his letter to John Fahey, "I am writing to inform the National Geographic Society that I have discovered life on Mars," and asks that his findings be published in National Geographic.
The NASA-JPL photograph that has evidence of life on Mars is PIA10214, a panoramic montage of a series of snapshots of the Red Planet that were taken by the Rover Spirit in November 2007, when Spirit was perched near the western edge of the plateau called Home Plate in the inner basin of the Columbia Hills range inside Gusev Crater.
This photograph was the focus of public scrutiny in January, when two anomalous human figures were spotted on the far left edge of the plateau. The figures were quickly dismissed as a natural rock formation resulting from erosion by wind, water, and time.
Basiago, 47, founder and president of the Mars Anomaly Research Society, thought that the enigmatic forms looked like a statue or the fossilized remains of Martians fleeing a cataclysmic event. If the figures on the plateau were artificial, he reasoned, then the valley below might also contain evidence that Mars is - or once was - inhabited.
The lawyer searched the broad westward expanse of the Martian surface that can be seen in the photograph taken by Spirit for other indications of life after enlarging the photograph on his new HP Pavilion Entertainment Personal Computer.
On December 7th, Basiago made his discovery. "I was astonished by what I found," he said. "There, on the Red Planet, were beings in blue bodysuits and the abstract artwork of a Martian civilization. I was looking at the first evidence of life beyond Earth!"
In his letter to the National Geographic Society, the lawyer writes that careful evaluation of PIA10214 reveals "a cosmic treasure trove of pictographic evidence of life on Mars, including humanoid beings, animal species, carved statues, and built structures."
According to Basiago, the humanoid beings photographed in PIA10214 have bulbous heads and elongated bodies, like the extraterrestrials described in alien contact accounts. Some have two arms and legs like human beings, while others have multiple appendages and segmented or larval bodies, as if they are human-insect hybrids.
In one part of the photograph, a bizarre array of statues of different human and animal heads litters Tsiolkovski Ridge. In another, humanoid beings can be seen sitting among a group of rocks centered around a grotesque humanoid skull.
Many of the animals that appear in the NASA photo resemble the frogs, lizards, serpents, and tortoises of Earth. Others resemble the extinct reptile species known as plesiosaurs, which had long necks like snakes and round bodies like turtles.
There is evidence of camouflage in some of the species. One is transparent in form.
The lawyer included with his letter a paper entitled The Discovery of Life on Mars with images of humanoids, animals, statues, and structures from the NASA photograph.    Sources close to the investigation say this paper will be comparable to Darwin's On the Origin of Species in terms of its impact on science and achieves 50 "firsts" in science.
The letter and paper can be found on the World Wide Web at
Basiago was the editor of Alfred Lambremont Webre's Exopolitics: Politics, Government and Law in the Universe (Universe Books, 2005), which uses as a case study human contact with an advanced civilization on Mars.
He holds five academic degrees, including a BA in History from UCLA and a Master of Philosophy from the University of Cambridge.
In asking the National Geographic Society to continue its great tradition of science writing about human civilization and the natural world by informing the public that this photograph reveals the existence of life forms on Mars, he closes his letter by stating that with this find begins "a new chapter of the human adventure in the Cosmos."

So if we can accept that there are critters on the Red Planet that have ‘bulbous heads, elongated bodies and multiple appendages,’ it’s not much of a stretch to conclude that there should be big hairy bipedal proto-humans here on the Water Planet, right? 

Considering how circus-like American election cycles are, I’m leaning toward Andrew Basiago as POTUS. Imagine how cool it would be if a Sasquatch agreed to be his running mate.
Think I’m kidding?
Well, you're right, I am kidding, but once you start reading about Basiago's time travel experiencs, it gets a lot weirder, trust me.

Monday, February 22, 2016

The Sasquatch People - People who are into Sasquatch

Every week or two I do an online search of new developments in the world of Sasquatch and mostly there is little to be found. A sighting report, a blurry photo doesn't cut the mustard and so I deepen my search toward the people who have produced interesting stuff in the past.

That's the Toddster in the middle, me on the left masquerading as Meldrum.

Todd Standing is still off the radar, as is Doc Meldrum, (who has begun to surface at distant conventions to pitch his book or to tear apart a questionable bit of footage here and there), Brian Sykes and Melba Ketchum’s assertions of true Bigfoot DNA have never broken through the crust of naysayer opinion and and so I am forced back toward the weirdos like Matthew Johnson, Kewaunee Lapseritis and Mike Paterson. 

Look out Matt! He's right behind you!

Johnson's website,, is so hard to navigate as to render it nearly non-viewable, though he claims his Southern Oregon Habituation location has been overrun by uninvited newcomers, there is some mention of him bringing additional 'witnesses' to that location. He also states that the Sasquatch that speaks to him in his mind ( I said 'weirdos' right?) told him of a new location where more contact may occur.

'and so, ah, we're basically toast..'

Kewaunee Lapseritis is still doing his 'Sasquatch People' tour where along with his recent bride and at least one Native American lecturer/friend ( a fellow known as ‘Sunbow’) he espouses the dire warnings that humans are still screwing up everything, particularly in an environmental sense, and it's not looking good for our future.

Mike Paterson communicates to his flock of supporters and detractors solely through Youtube and because Youtube makes it hard to find fresh information by mixing up everything people post, it's hard to know what Paterson is thinking about his three year relationship (gone awry) with a seemingly inter-dimensional family of hairy, sentient, oversize bipedal beings. (note to Mike, if you happen to read this; Dude, get your own web/blog page so we can learn about what you’re up to more easily. They’re free!)

This last guy is interesting to me right now for a couple of reasons.

Paterson has never made any efforts that I can see to monetize his 'discovery' and he has established a relationship with a documentary filmmaker named Chris Munch who has taken Paterson’s work a few steps farther by parlaying footage and interviews with the Sasquatch Ontario contactee into a separate Youtube account (called Fir and Cedar) where he has an ongoing series of clips featuring 'sensitives' who claim to be able to speak telepathically with the Sasquatch. Weirdos, right? (another note: Munch, please do the same as Mike and make a dedicated blogsite that we can get the latest info on your work. Youtube is annoying, man.) Nuff said about that.

Forced perspective of Thom's own bare foot, probably.

Lastly, we also have Thom Powell, the Junior High School Science teacher whose curiosity about Bigfoot has pushed him into authoring two very good books( The Locals and Edges of Science) and into becoming a featured lecturer at Sasquatch/Paranormal cons and meetups around the region.

I met Powell at a recent conference in Ocean Shores and while he signed my dog-earred copy of The Locals, I asked him about whether he was going to talk about the 'weird stuff' when he was scheduled to speak. He said, 'Oh, you're going to want to stick around...the 'woo-woo' is coming!' 

And he wasn't kidding.

Here I will repost my recollections from the 2014 Sasquatch Summit, when Powell took the stage.

Thom said,

‘They are observers of humans and sentinels’, though he never explains what they’re looking for.

‘They live underground, along with ETs’, but he doesn’t suggest where that might be.

‘Some go rogue’, explaining negative witness reports of menacing bfs.

‘We are being led into a greater awareness’ which is appropriately ‘woo, woo’.

‘bigfoot picks the habituation sites and the people THEY want to interact with, not
the other way around.’ This makes some sense I guess.  And finally,

‘They prefer to interact with humble people’ so this will leave Barackman out. (just teasin’ Cliff.)

Thom suggested that if we want to have an encounter with a bigfoot in the woods, we have to have good thoughts and humble intentions. We should pick up litter. This may be a good idea, but it’s still funny.

Then he posted an image of a wormhole, calling them Einstein-Rosen Bridges and images of books supporting wack-theories including Michael Talbot’s ‘The Holographic Universe’ which I have read and enjoyed, but don’t fully support myself.

I will try to corner Thom on March 5th at the UFO/Paranormal conference and see if he’s interested in my new line of Sasquatch-inspired litter bags. Angel investors, are you listening?

So…is the worm is turning as I suggest?  People who are interested in the subject of Bigfoot are slowly coming around to the possibility that Bigfoot is not just a primitive throw-back from early mans evolution that is really good at hide and seek, but that all of these sightings are more likely evidence of a life form that does indeed exist outside the boundaries of current human understanding of physics

Bigfoot World Gone Crazy?

I t’s been a while since my last entry here on Bizarre Bigfoot, mostly because we have not had any solid developments worth noting. A...