Sunday, March 27, 2016

Bigfoot For President



And now for the edification of readers of Bizarre Bigfoot comes the news of the candidacy of Washington State Attorney Andrew D. Basiago. The reason for Mr. Basiago’s inclusion on this site is one of his campaign promises, the full disclosure and protection of the species of hominid we lovingly know as ‘Sasquatch’.

But the bizarreness does not end here.
                                                Click the images to make 'em bigger! Do it!
Turns out Mr. B also has some rather unusual history, including a childhood spent time-traveling to Mars, and the conclusion that one particular rock photographed on Mars looks like a Bigfoot

Here’s an excerpt from the press release:
“A lawyer in the United States has written the National Geographic Society, asking it to publish in National Geographic his discovery that a photograph taken and beamed back to Earth by NASA’s Mars Rover Spirit contains evidence of life on Mars. In his letter, Andrew D. Basiago, 47, wrote that his analysis of the NASA photograph of the Red Planet captioned PIA10214 has revealed images of human and animal life forms, as well as statues and other structures built by advanced, intelligent beings. “This image is the most significant photograph ever taken by human beings from Earth,” Basiago wrote. Sadly for Mr B, photo experts are saying that the “Bigfoot on Mars” rock is actually just a few inches high and a few yards from the camera.

Here is Basiago’s press release in whole:
A lawyer in the United States has written a letter to the president of the National Geographic Society providing him with evidence of humanoid and animal life on Mars that he has found in a photograph taken by NASA's Mars Rover Spirit.
This epochal discovery constitutes the first evidence ever gathered proving the existence of life beyond planet Earth, and affirms controversial theories long advanced in works of literature and science that Mars, one of Earth's nearest celestial neighbors, harbors life.
Andrew D. Basiago, the lawyer who discovered the evidence of life on Mars, begins his letter to John Fahey, "I am writing to inform the National Geographic Society that I have discovered life on Mars," and asks that his findings be published in National Geographic.
The NASA-JPL photograph that has evidence of life on Mars is PIA10214, a panoramic montage of a series of snapshots of the Red Planet that were taken by the Rover Spirit in November 2007, when Spirit was perched near the western edge of the plateau called Home Plate in the inner basin of the Columbia Hills range inside Gusev Crater.
This photograph was the focus of public scrutiny in January, when two anomalous human figures were spotted on the far left edge of the plateau. The figures were quickly dismissed as a natural rock formation resulting from erosion by wind, water, and time.
Basiago, 47, founder and president of the Mars Anomaly Research Society, thought that the enigmatic forms looked like a statue or the fossilized remains of Martians fleeing a cataclysmic event. If the figures on the plateau were artificial, he reasoned, then the valley below might also contain evidence that Mars is - or once was - inhabited.
The lawyer searched the broad westward expanse of the Martian surface that can be seen in the photograph taken by Spirit for other indications of life after enlarging the photograph on his new HP Pavilion Entertainment Personal Computer.
On December 7th, Basiago made his discovery. "I was astonished by what I found," he said. "There, on the Red Planet, were beings in blue bodysuits and the abstract artwork of a Martian civilization. I was looking at the first evidence of life beyond Earth!"
In his letter to the National Geographic Society, the lawyer writes that careful evaluation of PIA10214 reveals "a cosmic treasure trove of pictographic evidence of life on Mars, including humanoid beings, animal species, carved statues, and built structures."
According to Basiago, the humanoid beings photographed in PIA10214 have bulbous heads and elongated bodies, like the extraterrestrials described in alien contact accounts. Some have two arms and legs like human beings, while others have multiple appendages and segmented or larval bodies, as if they are human-insect hybrids.
In one part of the photograph, a bizarre array of statues of different human and animal heads litters Tsiolkovski Ridge. In another, humanoid beings can be seen sitting among a group of rocks centered around a grotesque humanoid skull.
Many of the animals that appear in the NASA photo resemble the frogs, lizards, serpents, and tortoises of Earth. Others resemble the extinct reptile species known as plesiosaurs, which had long necks like snakes and round bodies like turtles.
There is evidence of camouflage in some of the species. One is transparent in form.
The lawyer included with his letter a paper entitled The Discovery of Life on Mars with images of humanoids, animals, statues, and structures from the NASA photograph.    Sources close to the investigation say this paper will be comparable to Darwin's On the Origin of Species in terms of its impact on science and achieves 50 "firsts" in science.
The letter and paper can be found on the World Wide Web at http://www.exopolitics.com.
Basiago was the editor of Alfred Lambremont Webre's Exopolitics: Politics, Government and Law in the Universe (Universe Books, 2005), which uses as a case study human contact with an advanced civilization on Mars.
He holds five academic degrees, including a BA in History from UCLA and a Master of Philosophy from the University of Cambridge.
In asking the National Geographic Society to continue its great tradition of science writing about human civilization and the natural world by informing the public that this photograph reveals the existence of life forms on Mars, he closes his letter by stating that with this find begins "a new chapter of the human adventure in the Cosmos."



So if we can accept that there are critters on the Red Planet that have ‘bulbous heads, elongated bodies and multiple appendages,’ it’s not much of a stretch to conclude that there should be big hairy bipedal proto-humans here on the Water Planet, right? 

Considering how circus-like American election cycles are, I’m leaning toward Andrew Basiago as POTUS. Imagine how cool it would be if a Sasquatch agreed to be his running mate.
Think I’m kidding?
Well, you're right, I am kidding, but once you start reading about Basiago's time travel experiencs, it gets a lot weirder, trust me.



http://andy2016.com/proposals/

1 comment:

  1. Definitely qualifies as bizzare!
    And a great pick up line..."I've been to Mars"

    ReplyDelete

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